Much as I love living in the lovely land of Denial - I think it's time to face the reality of this Powerlifting competition, that I seem to have signed up for.
I've been going to the "gettin' stronger" workouts, Patty has kept reminding me that we need to go to the store to buy our "oh so fashionable" singlets almost daily - so you would think that denial land would be in the far distance. Not so much, my affection for the land of Denial is not something to be taken lightly. That being said - I also know there is no backing out at this point.
So - my thoughts on the whole thing......
1. I need to lose 7 lbs before the competition - I'm not sure why this is kind of a big deal to me - but I do NOT want to be in the "heavyweight" division. This is mental stigma for me - I believe it stems from watching my brothers wrestle in high school, and when they didn't drop below the heavyweight division - they had to deal with some monsters!! So, since coming back from North Dakota, I've been really watching what I eat - so far successfully (ok, it's only been 2 days...) So, my first competition goal - is to avoid the heavyweight division.
2. Deadlifts - Ironically, I'm feeling best about the DL's overall. I think my biggest fear is that I'll pull so hard, and put so much into it that I will have a bit of an "oops" moment.....which will throw me off and I'll dump the bar. Doesn't happen much anymore, but when it does, I have to say, I do get a bit discombobulated.
3. Squats - I'm having issues with the squats. I can go heavy - but for some reason, when I go below parallel with 180+, I tend to relax at the bottom. I'm not sure why this happens, but I can kind of equate the feeling to finding the balance point when you're upside down on the rings. I know it's not good. But when I focus on keeping everything tight the whole way - I'm not making it quite down far enough.....when I'm not that focused on keeping things tight, I can go low, but I hit that relaxation point. Bizarre - I think I must be a bit of a freak with this. So, need to work on that the next couple weeks.
4. Bench - I'm in a big freakin' rut. I have definitely not hit a max in about a year. In fact, I think it was probably close to a year ago that I hit 150. Since then I've hit 155 twice. Kinda sad. Tonight, the bench felt terrible - just off, which bums me out, because I went in thinking I was gonna rock it out. My shoulder felt better than it has in a while - no twinges or tweaks. I felt good!.....but alas, it was just not to be a good BP day.
5. UGHHH - the outfit. I don't know what psychopath decided that everyone had to wear singlets, but that is really just cruel and unusual punishment - especially out in public. Sheesh, my biggest nightmare is that I'll look like a big blob of stuffed sausage...or a pumpkin type figure with a large protruding belly with two boobs sitting on top. Just not a pretty picture. I think, I can delude myself into believing I look better than I do, as long as I don't see any pictures. Pictures have an evil way of booting you out of denial land and giving you a hard dose of reality.
I guess I just hope I can figure out why the heck I'm in such a chronic state of no improvement on my BP and my Squat, and if I'm gonna do this competition, at least make a decent show of it.
On another note, I go to the Endocrinologist on Tuesday, to see what is up with my thyroid meds suddenly going all wonky. We'll see if I can get that straightened out before 2010. Maybe something in my thyroid/endocrine system is holding me back.....probably not, but it's a thought......something.
DRATS! I know - it's just an excuse. Nevermind - disregard that last sentence, I refuse to make excuses. Excuses are just crap, and a way of deluding yourself into thinking that you are better than you are. So no excuses, it is what it is, and I'll just have to figure out why.
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